GIF Talk

Evan Roth (of G.R.L. and F.A.T.) has created a 10-minute ode to the asinine antics of animated Graphics Interchange Format files. What better way to celebrate than setting this massive mashup to Girl Talk and marvelling at how obsessed we are with babies and cats and science fiction and...

We Are The Machine

Today was the first day I heard the term "Semantic Web" even though people have been talking about it - as far as I can tell - shortly after the creation and implementation of the Extensible Markup Language (XML) in web development (officially recommended by the World Wide Web Consortium, or W3C, in 1998). Semantic Web, often referred to as Web 3.0, is driven by metadata, simply defined as "data about data." If you're having trouble understanding, I found a simplified explanation on YouTube.

The most interesting thing about Semantic Web, for me, is that language is at the heart of it. Definitions and organizations of words will ultimately determine how efficiently the internet works for everyone based on their respective searches. It's not that words aren't at the heart of search engines already, but there is a logic being built in metadata that will allow more specific returns (reactions) to queries. Each of us will contribute to a global meta-consciousness through our actions on the Semantic Web. In short, we are collectively paving the way for artificial intelligence: programs with the wealth of the world's prepackaged data at their disposal.

Index This

For a YouTube channel whose most popular - and largely humorless - series of videos is called Make a Hot Girl Laugh, the satire in Google Threatens To Kill Users is surprisingly well-written. Like we needed any more proof that the phrase "XXX,000,000 (insert here) Fans Can't Be Wrong" is complete f***ing bull****.

Google, where's my gTeleport already?

xkcd

Randall Munroe is proof that a simple idea, well loved, can become complicated as all hell.

What does xkcd mean? (44:33)

People act out xkcd strips (7:15): "Cory Doctorow wears a red cape and goggles when he blogs..."; "Richard Stallman... sleeps with a katana..."; "Janeane Garofolo jumping a motorcycle off of the international space station as it crashes over an island with a volcanic eruption and tyrannosaurs..."; "Do you expect me to fly?" (19:15)

Also: Programming while drinking (10:15), "Maybe that's how Cory Doctorow gets to the balloon..." (21:25), lisp book (29:52), "If a raptor were to attack me in this room, how would I escape?" (30:28), River Tam (32:49), "Science. It works, bitches." (33:22), EMP Cannon (38:03), Sudo make me a sandwich (49:01), Braille (49:47), live Google doodle (52:52), and elaborate fight scenes (55:10).

LaundroMatinee

My favorite music blog is My Old Kentucky Blog. LaundroMatinee, according to its Vimeo account, is essentially MOKB's vlog counterpart:

"Craig 'Dodge' Lile from MyOldKentuckyBlog.com, with help from the incredibly talented Jeff DuPont (audio) , Doug Fellegy (video), Tim Wilsbach (video), Joe Wallace (Video), Michelle Castillo (Video) and Nate Karamanski (video), has created laundromatinee.com - a site that features the in-studio sessions MOKB records for its SIRIUS XM Blog Radio show (Tuesdays at Noon EST on SIRIUS 26/XM 43)."

P.S. I'm absolutely smitten with this video in particular.

In Plain English

Leelefever of Common Craft covers a lot of topics in less than five minutes; everything from zombies to podcasting with the occasional current affair thrown in (ie. elections, investing, etc.).

Internet Video Memes

Oh, is that what you call them...

All sarcasm aside, this is a little trip down Memory Meme Lane in this big bad Internet City.

1) "All your base are belong to us"
This was the first internet phenomenon that really impressed me. I think it had something to do with the 8-bit Engrish obsession combined with the lure of en masse photoshopping.

2) "Gonads and Strife"
Or "Weee!" with a lot of e's if you prefer. Sure, it doesn't make any sense at first, but the hyperactive squirrel touches on some classic themes: drugs, death, R2D2... who am I kidding... I just watch it to sing "gonads in the lightning!"

3) "G.I. Joe PSAs" - If you ever lost faith in the interweb's ability to completely dumbfound you with random bullshit, don't blame Eric Fensler. I can only hope that The Rise of Cobra inspires a whole new set of live action PSAs.

4) "Powerthirst" - Let's forget for a moment that someone actually made a real life version of Brawndo (the sports drink that causes famine in Idiocracy) and used the Powerthirst voice talent to market it. It's all about the turbopuns and the preposterone hyperbole for me. From Rawberry to the 'fighter plane made of biceps,' watching the Powerthirst videos almost makes me feel good about skipping the gym.

5) "Can't Tase This" - Regardless of your OMG thoughts on the UF tasing incident, nothing spices up the internews like a little old skool... STOP... Hammertime. The sound editing is priceless, but I think the funniest thing for me is the implied lyrical oxymoron. Yes, they can touch this. Not only can they touch it, they can also tase it. Just you wait and see.

6) "Muppets react to '2 girls one cup'" - 2 girls 1 cup was probably the most disgusting thing I've ever seen. Kinda like having both my eyes raped by a troop of silverback gorillas. But, like many things in life, the Muppets found a way to make me laugh at it. Probably not what Jim Henson had in mind. Rolf FTW.

7) "There Will Be Milkshakes" - When a murder scene from a hyper-serious movie and the chorus from a sassy R&B song have something in common, well... opposites attract. They go straight to 'parking' after sharing a milkshake at the drugstore. What they don't tell you in health class is that the internet gets the orphaned baby after the one night stand. If I weren't such a lazy man I'd probably mash up Daniel Day Lewis and Kelis on morphthing.com for you. But I am.

8) "Oprah OVER 9000 penises f/ PEDOBEAR remix" - If you're unfamiliar with trolls and Pedopals then you may want to watch the clip from Attack of the Show before you delve into the remix. On one hand you might feel sorry for Empress O in her sincere concern for children online. On the other, you can't help but marvel at her gullibility as she serves to educate only by example. "Now make that your power!"

History of the Internet